I’ve always believed that everything happens for a reason, and my solo travels through Pisac have only deepened that faith. Recently, while exploring a small shop, I struck up a conversation with a woman who seemed to intuitively understand what I needed. She noticed the tension in my neck, and with permission, began to gently massage my shoulders. I could feel her expertise as she worked; she instinctively found each point of tension.

As we spoke, I learned she was a practitioner of bufo ceremonies. Pisac is a known haven for medicine work, yet until then, I hadn’t felt a particular call. The timing of this encounter, though, felt intentional—as if the universe was gently guiding me. I had tried bufo once before and found it blissful, so I took this as a sign to try again.

Her approach included three doses administered consecutively, each bringing me deeper into a space of clarity and peace. This journey mirrored my recent experiences, where both bufo and ayahuasca brought me similar visions and messages. Every time, I find words that bring me closer to describing what I feel: the experience of being safely held, of fully surrendering, and of reconnecting with the breath. Breath became not only an anchor but the answer. Letting go of control with each inhale and exhale, I glimpsed beyond the constructs of daily life and into a space where true peace lies—a world woven with deep breaths and a restful, blissful dance of fractal patterns, sacred geometry, kaleidoscopic vision, shifting and morphing forms.

More and more, I realize that fear often holds people back from experiencing medicine, keeping them from facing their reality, their fears, and the desire to control. But by surrendering and embracing my breath, I let the medicine guide me. Nature has gifted us with these powerful, natural tools, and in stripping away resistance, we can access a world filled with blissful imagery, peace, and deep breaths.

I hold a vision of creating this healing space, and every connection I make along this path feels like another step toward its fulfillment. Nature wouldn’t provide this medicine if it wasn’t meant to be shared.

During this medicine journey, one of the most powerful releases I experienced was through my jaw. It twitched and moved in all directions as if unlocking something long held. I came to understand this release as a breakthrough in my ability to speak my truth. Growing up, I had been silenced, unable to express myself freely. My voice was controlled, and I was taught to keep my thoughts hidden. There was no space for me to ask for what I wanted or to share my feelings.

My friend Lili later shared that tension in the jaw is often associated with maternal lineage and generational trauma. I felt this connection deeply and could sense a lineage of unspoken words and suppressed emotions. Not only in my lineage but in this world. Men have the power, women were made to be shushed. But beyond that, I knew this experience was about reclaiming my truth—about sharing my story with the world. It was a calling to express myself in ways I hadn’t before, as if the jaw release unlocked an invitation to speak from the heart.

In the week following this experience, my energy shifted, and integration began. What had felt blissful during the journey now became heavy as emotions surfaced. Physically, I felt depleted, turning to comfort foods and struggling with cravings I couldn’t explain. Oreos with peanut butter became a daily ritual, my go-to for comfort. Hormones felt out of sync, and I couldn’t quite pinpoint the cause due to other reasons I will mention in my next blog post.

One day, my fellow teachers/friends here and I decided to go for piercings together—a spontaneous way to bond and mark this transformative time. As I went through the process, they observed how unaffected I seemed by the pain. This reaction, though common for me, brought up a familiar narrative: I have always been “the strong one.” It’s a role I’ve embodied since childhood, becoming independent early and adapting to life's challenges on my own. Whether in the gym, at work, or in life, people have labeled me as strong, and I had come to see this as my default mode.

The next day, I went for my usual physio appointment, where I receive dry needling for muscle tension. Typically, these sessions didn’t faze me, but this time was different. My body felt incredibly sensitive, almost as if it no longer needed this intense physical intervention. One needle hit a spot near my shoulder blade, and the pain was overwhelming. I could barely breathe. For the first time, I had to ask the therapist to stop, and tears filled my eyes as a flood of emotion was released alongside the physical pain.

When I got back home, my friends asked about the session, I could only ask for a hug. I broke down in tears, unable to articulate the depth of the release. As I lay down for a nap, a heavy, aching sensation filled my sternum. I began tapping on my chest, instinctively pounding on that tight spot as I cried. It felt like my heart was breaking open, a raw and profound release from deep within.

Reflecting further, I looked into the spiritual meaning behind jaw tension. I found that a tight jaw can signify “chewing on emotions” or coping with emotional eating. This resonated profoundly; I’ve struggled with emotional eating throughout my whole life, often wondering what lay at its root. Realizing that my suppressed voice had manifested in these ways was a revelation. I’d been “chewing” on words left unspoken, emotions unexpressed. Additionally, I learned that the jaw and throat are energetically linked to the pelvic floor—a fascinating connection, as I had dealt with PCOS in my past.

As I continue this journey of release and discovery, I’m reminded that healing is layered and complex. Each release opens a new understanding, guiding me closer to my truth and offering me more to share.

I’ll be sharing more on this, including recent encounters on my travels and other insights in my next blog post—stay tuned.